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The White Envelope

3 min read
[A moving story I just read to my kids.]

For the Man Who Hated Christmas
(A true Christmas story by Nancy W. Gavin)

"It's just a small, white envelope stuck among the branches of our Christmas tree. No name, no identification, no inscription. It has peeked through the branches of our tree for the past ten years.

"It all began because my husband Mike hated Christmas. Oh, not the true meaning of Christmas, but the commercial aspects of it – overspending and the frantic running around at the last minute to get a tie for Uncle Harry and the dusting powder for Grandma – the gifts given in desperation because you couldn't think of anything else.

"Knowing he felt this way, I decided one year to bypass the usual shirts, sweaters, ties and so forth. I reached for something special just for Mike. The inspiration came in an unusual way.

"Our son Kevin, who was 12 that year, was on the wrestling team at the school he attended. Shortly before Christmas, there was a non-league match against a team sponsored by an inner-city church. These youngsters, dressed in sneakers so ragged that shoestrings seemed to be the only thing holding them together, presented a sharp contrast to our boys in their spiffy blue and gold uniforms and sparkling new wrestling shoes.

"As the match began, I was alarmed to see that the other team was wrestling without headgear, a kind of light helmet designed to protect a wrestler's ears. It was a luxury the ragtag team obviously could not afford.

"Well, we ended up walloping them. We took every weight class. Mike, seated beside me, shook his head sadly, "I wish just one of them could have won," he said. "They have a lot of potential, but losing like this could take the heart right out of them." Mike loved kids – all kids. He so enjoyed coaching little league football, baseball and lacrosse. That's when the idea for his present came.

"That afternoon, I went to a local sporting goods store and bought an assortment of wrestling headgear and shoes, and sent them anonymously to the inner-city church. On Christmas Eve, I placed a small, white envelope on the tree, the note inside telling Mike what I had done, and that this was his gift from me.

"Mike's smile was the brightest thing about Christmas that year. And that same bright smile lit up succeeding years. For each Christmas, I followed the tradition – one year sending a group of mentally handicapped youngsters to a hockey game, another year a check to a pair of elderly brothers whose home had burned to the ground the week before Christmas, and on and on.

"The white envelope became the highlight of our Christmas. It was always the last thing opened on Christmas morning, and our children – ignoring their new toys – would stand with wide-eyed anticipation as their dad lifted the envelope from the tree to reveal its contents. As the children grew, the toys gave way to more practical presents, but the small, white envelope never lost its allure.

"The story doesn't end there. You see, we lost Mike last year due to dreaded cancer. When Christmas rolled around, I was still so wrapped in grief that I barely got the tree up. But Christmas Eve found me placing an envelope on the tree. And the next morning, I found it was magically joined by three more. Unbeknownst to the others, each of our three children had for the first time placed a white envelope on the tree for their dad. The tradition has grown and someday will expand even further with our grandchildren standing to take down that special envelope.

"Mike's spirit, like the Christmas spirit will always be with us."


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The White Envelope was initially published in the December 14, 1982 issue of Women's Day magazine.
Posted by Bijan Khazai on December 7, 2020
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Community Reflections

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31 Reflections shared

Kristy Pace Dec 6, 2020
What an incredibly touching tribute to a kind, open heart.
Audrey Lin Dec 6, 2020
What a beautiful story, Bijan! Thank you for sharing Mike and Nancy and their family's Christmas "tradition" ! :)
Ellie Hyatt Dec 8, 2020
How could you not read this story and end with tears in your yes. I have begun making donations at Christmas but love the tradition of the envelope on the tree. It makes the spirit of giving visible.
You touched my heart, thank you!
Yoo-Mi Lee Dec 8, 2020
Such a beautiful story! Thank you so much for sharing this tradition, Bijan.
Marliese Khazai Dec 10, 2020
So inspiring just at a time when discussions arose what and how to share a birthday give away on a birthday on 31st of December. Thanks for sharing and the wonderful idea.
Kerri Dec 11, 2020
Bijan, thank you for sharing such intimacy with your beautiful open heart. These are experiences I haven't had in my life. Through you, I feel a taste of the profound love, honor, connection and grace you and your family share. You are such a gift.
Francine Dec 11, 2020
Heartwarming and so inspirational. There are so many ways to celebrate Christmas without giving gifts that many people don’t really need,
Ragunath Dec 11, 2020
Goosebumps! Thanks a lot for sharing Bijan.
Maria Dec 12, 2020
What we so need in the world...Love & Open Heartedness put into action.
An inspiring read...thankyou
Mamta Nanda Dec 12, 2020
Moved me to tears. thanks for sharing. Very inspiring.
hansa patel Dec 12, 2020
Very thoughtful act. To make it a tradition out of it you children’s understanding. Good way to teach to new generation the meaning of gift. It is not about me and you but it is about someone who is in need.
Marie Altman Dec 13, 2020
This brought tears. Beautiful story of giving.
Jasmeet Dec 13, 2020
such a beautiful and meaningful Christmas tradition!
Roberta Keegan Dec 14, 2020
Thank you for that touchingly lovely story - and true! it certainly brought tears to my eyes as it did to others, I see. Needing the reminder that this Covid-19 virus is not the only game in town was certainly needed by me; as is the reminder that never is the need to give not great. We in this country have so many avenues to give to so many in this country as everywhere. Thank you, Bijan Khazai and, of course, many thanks to Nancy Gavin, who established a very thoughtful "giving Christmas Tradition".
jeena methala johny Feb 23, 2021
incredible story
Diane Diamond Feb 25, 2021
Truly touching and inspiring story! May that spirit of gifting be prevalent in our world! Certainly many of us don't really need another object or thing to add to our material possessions. However the heart/soul/spirit nourishment of making a difference for those in need is immearsurably valuable!
Mansur Kreps Apr 15, 2022
So beautiful. I wish my Christmas events had been like this. This is the true spirit.
Angelica Apr 15, 2022
What a great practice. I'm going to have a white envelope for my husband this year.
Mandi J Buckner Apr 16, 2022
Beautiful.
Usha Apr 19, 2022
One act of kindness becoming the tradition to be followed by generations… amazing
Randy Taylor Nov 12, 2022
I am in tears with the loving kindness this gift of sharing brought to others and to your family.
Thank you.
Bradley Feb 15, 2023
Thank you for posting this, Bijan. Ellie was spot-on with her comment, as was everyone else. This is such an inspiring and heartfelt story<3.
Rajesh Golani Jul 12, 2023
I almost had tears in my eyes as I read through this. Thanks for sharing.
Naomi Jul 12, 2023
What a beautiful story! Made me cry... I love it.
Paul Fillinger Jul 12, 2023
This touching in several ways: a family tradition, and act of giving, the viral effect and what I like most is not tell us the contents of the last four envelops--it's left for us to "fill in".
Yashio Jul 14, 2023
Mike had a great spirit and Bijan responded in the perfect way every Christmas. It's so beautiful that his three sons succeeded the white envelope tradition. I can envision Bijan's grandchildren will join in the tradition and further.
Varda Jun 12, 2024
Thank You Bijan Khazai, you are an inspiring dad.
My eyes got moist to read that that she loss Mike who hated commercial xmas.
white envelope spirit tradition still live in my heart.
Doruk Jun 12, 2024
Oh wow, such a beautiful story...I finished with my tears in my eyes and gratitude in my heart. Thanks for sharing.
Gabriela Jun 12, 2024
This story brought tears to my eyes, I found it very touching and inspiring! Thank you for sharing it!
Evelyn Asher Jun 12, 2024
How meaningful! This reminds me when my sweetheart suffered a tragic accident trimming the ivy from his wealth of pine trees. My neighbor cleared my driveway of the debris and at intervals when the leaves covered the driveway. They also brought me soup and allowed me to take their daughter on Saturday afternoons - what a marvelous relationship of our hearts that remains today. The young lady fifth grade at the time, was married this year at age 30.
Solène Jul 19, 2025
"Thank you, Bijan, for sharing your story! What a touching story. I'm glad the Christmas tradition continued. Yes, small actions can make a big difference and bring happiness to others."

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