From Despair To Hope: Thank You
--Sara O'Toole
2 minute read
Nov 24, 2014


Hello Dear Friends!

Happy Monday to you (or Tuesday morning). I hope you are well.

I am so grateful that I was able to hear the Awakin Call on Saturday November 22nd. It was wonderful. My entire family and I listened to the call with Gwynthe, and we have talked about it often since then. She is so inspirational. Music really is healing.

I am looking forward very much to being part of your Awakin Calls transcription and live Twitter feed. I'm very grateful for this opportunity to work with you. Until recently I have felt very cut off from the world. You see, I have agoraphobia and panic disorder. It is a condition of the mind much like cancer of the body. There are periods of health and the reversal of the disease. There are also periods of remission. It is something that I believe will be healed fully some day. In the meantime. I have learned to live with it.

In almost every moment I am grateful. This is why I have not been able to work outside the home. I was very good at my job and paid a lot of money. For eight years we have lived on half the income and have learned how to live more simply. That in itself is something I am very grateful to have learned but there is still much to learn.

My husband has had a big burden, not just as sole support but with errands. He never complains. He is supportive and loving. But I was very, very hard on myself. When I forgot the truth, when I stopped practicing gratitude, meditation, when I cut myself off from people I love, I began to believe the lies of Ego. I began to believe I was nothing but a burden and that world would be better off without me. Can that only have been a few short weeks ago?

When I got an invitation from my friend to join his Gratitude Challenge, this year, I was so happy. I have loved his challenges on other forums in the past. I immediately accepted. I learned about KindSpring. Shortly after that, I saw the volunteer opportunity link and found ServiceSpace. I was so happy to see that these were things I could do from home. When you offered me a chance to join your team, It was like a light went on in my life. Your faith in me gave me dignity again. It gave me hope.

Since I will never be able to repay you, I will pay it forward. My sacred privilege and first love is service.

With gratitude and love,
Sara Michele (Mick/y) O'Toole

Posted by Sara O'Toole on Nov 24, 2014

9 Past Reflections