On The Day My Father Passed Away

[A touching note that I received from Amit yesterday. On one-year anniversary of his fathers passing, to honor him -- he took freshly-cooked food for people in his neighborhood along with bags of goodies for them to gift to a homeless person. A beautiful way of remembering him. The response from the neighbors has been amazing] Posted with permission and a little arm-twisting. :-) 

A year ago today, my father passed away. There are no words that can give true tribute to the man who gave me everything that I have today. In fact, these past 6 months during my travels throughout India and many other places, I somehow became closer to him, much to my surprise. I had the good fortune and opportunity to explore his roots and see his true humble beginnings and that of many of my family and friends across India. In reflecting on what it means to come from nothing, to have nothing, to seemingly be nothing to a world that has pre-defined formulas or benchmarks for success can be harrowing to one’s self-esteem and can possibly make you disconnected from the world. My dad beat the odds, met society’s formula and then found a way beyond by remembering his beginnings and helping those who are less fortunate. Less fortunate does not necessarily mean less money -- fortune comes in many ways, most importantly love, gratitude and generosity. My dad knew these things and so in his honor, I am here to both thank you for yours, offer you a small token of appreciation and ask you to help me honor my father and help those in need right here in my father’s other homeland -- America.

Today I am offering you Prasada, which in Sanskrit literally translates to "a gracious gift" or a mental condition of generosity. Within the context of my spiritual/religious beliefs, prasada or prasadam is food that is first offered to the Lord and then distributed for consumption bestowing spiritual blessings.
Over the next ten days I want you to search for an opportunity to connect with someone who is in need, specifically an individual who is homeless. Please take just a few minutes of your time to connect with him or her.  Perhaps they may initially ask you for money but respond back with kindness. Imagine their surprise when you ask them their name and where they are from -- introduce yourself and see if you can get to know them briefly. If you feel somewhat fearful, it is understandable, but ask yourself if that fear is justified. Remember that this person is probably scared too. Imagine if you were homeless, what would you need? What would be a priority? Food? Shelter? Clothing? Self-Esteem/Sense of Worth? Employment? Love? Compassion?

After you have created a connection, wish them a happy holiday and gift this humble bag of bare essentials: A fleece scarf, winter hat and two pairs of warm socks to help them fight off the cold; a pair of toothbrushes and toothpaste, a nail clipper set, body wash and lotion, hand sanitizer and a wash cloth as hygiene is essential for everyone and of course nutrition. Though I have included some basic snacks like Gatorade, fruit covered in yogurt and whole grain, candy canes and chocolate, and halls throat drops in case they are not feeling well, you need to help complete the package. Please clean the container in which you ate the prasadam from and re-fill it with food and gift it to them.

When you have completed this act of kindness, please let me know how it went -- tell me who you met and what you learned about them, how you felt, what you thought about and anything else you want to share. I want to gather these experiences and share it with others and see what the ripple effects may be.

If you really want to turn things up a notch or two, here are 3 ideas:

1)    Create a few bags of your own goodies to distribute and/or to pass on to someone else to distribute. This could be a great family activity and discussion/reflection session afterwards!

2)    Ask the individual to share/join you for a meal -- even something simple at a subway or nearby restaurant mixed with good conversation.

3)    Conduct your own or join an existing food and toy drive in your neighborhood or cultural or religious community to help those in need!

Trushar and I can’t thank you enough for all the love and support you have provided and continue to provide. We will get even greater joy in knowing that you will can share your love and generosity, something you have in abundance, with others who are in need as well.

With Love and Gratitude,
Amit & Trushar Dungarani
 

In addition, Amit wrote today: "When I did my Sun salutation in the morning yesterday, I prayed that people would be inspired to really connect and reach out to people.  One of my neighbors was touched and wanted to do something "kind" right away, so without even asking she removed my suit jacket and steamed it to remove some of the wrinkles so i could look nice at the rest of my stops.  Another neighbor is making some additional homeless kits of her own.  One woman commented on how she felt this was going to take her out of her comfort zone and she wasn't sure where to even look but she was glad she was prompted.  Many were excited with the challenge.  One 85+ year old couple knew right away who the bag was going to ... to think i wasn't even going to give them a bag because of their age but then i thought about you and bhai and the idea of assuming value and so I gave it to them ... they were so excited and i was so happy to hear they already had an existing connection with someone in need whom they had been trying to figure out what to do for them.  Two uncles commented on how they wished they had started thinking about some of these types of activities at a younger age and I responded with the heart is as young as you want it to be ... its never too late to start.  Another couple said they were going to involve their kids in the exercise.  So the ripples seems to be spreading."