April 29, 2017

Quote of the Week

"There may be no relationship that is closer, finer, harder, sweeter, happier, sadder, more filled with joy or fraught with woe than the relationship we have with our brothers and sisters." --Jeffrey Kruger

Nine Ways To Help Siblings Get Along

Science has shown that forgiveness—intentionally letting go of angry feelings toward someone who has harmed you—is good for the health and well-being of the forgiver. If you’re raising siblings, you can probably guess at another benefit: harmony at home. Forgiveness is critical for healing conflicts between siblings and nurturing a lifelong, trusting bond, says leading forgiveness researcher Dr. Robert Enright, educational psychologist at the University of Wisconsin-Madison and the founder of the International Forgiveness Institute. A study of more than 260 adult siblings offers evidence that the sibling relationship in childhood predicts their closeness as adults. Siblings that lack trust in each other in their early years will likely have a similar relationship with one another as adults; if their relationship was positive as kids, it will likely be strong in adulthood. Besides helping them get along better, teaching kids how to forgive in the context of the sibling relationship prepares them for dealing with hurts they’ll inevitably encounter in life, says Enright. “At home, in a lower-stakes environment where kids are hurting each other, but not gravely, that’s the perfect training ground for how to forgive.” Read on for practical suggestions of how to sow seeds of forgiveness in your home.

Reading Corner

Title: Siblings Without Rivalry: How to Help Your Children Live Together So You Can Live, Too
Authors: Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish
Ages: Adult
Why? This wise, groundbreaking book gives parents the practical tools they need to cope with conflict, encourage cooperation, reduce competition, and make it possible for children to experience the joys of their special relationship. With humor and understanding―much gained from raising their own children―Faber and Mazlish explain how and when to intervene in fights, provide suggestions on how to help children channel their hostility into creative outlets, and demonstrate how to treat children unequally and still be fair. --Publishers

Be the Change

The greatest gift we give our children may well be each other. In order to foster a good relationship between them, actively discuss the concept of forgiveness. Use stories and TV shows to raise questions for the discussion. Make sure they see you practicing forgiveness with them and in your other relationships.