Today I read a great article in Psychology Today on 6 reasons not to forgive (unless the time is right). It was a great relief to get a different perspective on a behaviour (forgive) that, if forced on us through guilt, actually leads to depression and unhappiness (without quite knowing why). If you have been deeply hurt, abused, traumatised, victimised, tortured etc. it is important to be allowed to feel those feelings (anger, resentment, thoughts of retaliation etc) and integrate the experience before you can move on. This may take hours, days, weeks, even years. The pressure to forgive before you are ready is a further trauma. Well meaning people can sometimes extend the hurt. The easily forgiven person often goes on to abuse again.